Twisted Minds and Twister
by kaberuchan
Summary: The author traps all of the cast from YuYuHakusho and YuGiOh! together in one house and tortures them!
1. Introduction

Ha, so here it is. You trap all the characters from YuGiOh! And YuYuHakusho together and what do you get?

This! Insane murder, deadly catfights, and all the other stuff that will make the cast want to kill me!

Please enjoy!

Twisted Minds and Twister

(Introduction)

"Hi everyone! I'm Kaberu-chan, the author of this fan fiction who you cannot kill because then I will not be able to write you all out of this house!" Kaberu-chan addresses everyone.

The entire cast stares intimidatingly, but Kaberu-chan's small mind is unaware of how much they would like to kill her. They give up and all walk off to do their own thing, while Kaberu-chan 'takes notes'.

Sniper is lazing around dying of boredom and tossing a set of dice up and down in his hand.

Duke runs up to him with sparkles surrounding them. "Dude, you have dice! I love you!" Duke hugs Sniper. " Soul mates!" Duke's eyes have gone starry.

Sniper looks down at duke darkly and quietly says, "I use these dice to kill people, and you may just be my next victim." Sniper has a vein sticking out and an involuntary twitch..

Kaberu-chan waltzes over to them humming la dee da and surrounded by flowers. "Yay, bishonen! Will you sign my chest?" she makes to take her shirt off but is cut short by Sniper, who throws three dice at her. "Hey, you almost hit me! But he's so-hot-I-am-hypnotized…" her eyes turn wide and glassy, but revert to normal as she dodges another dice attack.

Kaiba is sitting in a particularly dark corner organizing his deck in hopes of defeating Yugi. Mokuba is helping him.

Kaiba looks up and notices Hiei in the same corner. "What are _you_ doing here?" he asks rudely.

"I was advised that if I kill anymore people I will be arrested by the Spirit World again…" Hiei grimaces.

Poor little Mokuba figures it'll be safer to keep quiet, while Kaberu-chan is lurking in the dark, waiting for a chance to glomp on them.

Kaiba smiles. "Hmm, with your demon powers and my technological genius we will soon have created a machine to hypnotize the author into releasing us. Let's go." They walk off together.

Kaberu-chan yells after them, " Wait, no! I trapped you here because I want to use my supreme powers as author to force you hotties to fall in love with me and make love with me! Don't go!"

Marik is leaning against a wall, half-asleep, being watched over by Odion. Kaberu-chan is eyeing Marik.

Suddenly, Kaberu-chan jumps into the scene and yells, "Marik, all of the other bishonen have deserted me, but my love for you is the purest! I cried for you like no other, and I cheered so much when you weren't killed by your evil counterpart! Make love with me!"

Odion towers over Kaberu-chan intimidatingly. "Miss, if you try to do anything to Master Marik I shall be forced to destroy you."

Kaberu-chan says seriously (not really!) "Odion, I do love you, but if you try to keep me away from Marik I may just have to erase you from the plot of this story. Okay," grabs hold of Marik's arm," let's go to bed!"

Marik is unable to react, for, being raised by respectable tomb keepers; he has never seen a girl act this way before.


	2. The Cards of Death

All of a sudden I felt like saying something at the beginning of my fanfics, so here goes. I am Kaberu-chan, I am insane. The end of each chapter will have commentary by my split personalities. The first is the one in the story; Kaberu-chan. Kaberu-chan is a pervert…lol…

The next one is Kaberu-kun. Kaberu-kun likes to beat guys up, and gets annoyed easily.

Lastly is Kaberu-nyo. Kaberu-nyo is cute and fuzzy and brain-dead…

The Cards of Death

"Please don't kill me, Odion! Please don't kill me!" Kaberu-chan screamed.

"I will kill you if you do not write Ishizu into the story." Odion says grimly.

"Ahh, don't let him kill me!" Kaberu-chan seeks refuge behind Marik.

"So then, it's like that? I will leave you to Master Marik's dark side." Odion says, feigning kindness. Then he walks away.

Marik has turned evil and glares down at Kaberu-chan.

"If you write the story so that I obtain the three Egyptian God Cards I will spare you."

"Sure, I can do that…" Kaberu-chan's terrified chibi form says.

Bakura has decided to join the trend and has turned evil. " You will give me the seven Millennium Items."

_Five minutes later _

Kaberu-chan addresses the entire cast. " Hey let's play cards! First place winner gets the Egyptian god cards, and second place gets the seven millennium items!"

"But we don't _have_ cards, you idiot!" Duke, Tristan, Yusuke, Joey, and Kuwabara all yell.

" Easy, we'll use duel monsters cards. Everyone, gimme your decks." Kaberu-chan says, holding out her hands.

_Five minute later (again)_

"Okie dokie, Korebo is the ace, Saggi the Dark Clown is the two, and The Flaming Swordsman is the three-"

"Hey, he should be higher!" Joey yells.

"Shut it. Anyway, Harpy Lady is the four," Mai scowls, "Blue Eyes White Dragon is the five," Kaiba shakes a fist; Kaberu-chan took them from him, "Red Eyes is the six," Joey smiles, "Dark Magician Girl is the seven, Dark Magician is the eight, Time Wizard is the nine, Slifer the Sky Dragon is the jack, Obelisk the Tormentor is the queen, and The Winged Dragon of Ra is the king. Let's play!"

_Sixty minutes later_

Kaberu-chan kyaas; she has all three Egyptian god cards in her hand. "Ha, I have all three Egyptian god cards! I shall rule the world!"

"But can you _read_ the script on them?" Kaiba sneers.

"Um,no…"

"Remember our agreement?" evil Marik leans over to Kaberu-chan and hisses in her ear.

"Ahh, please don't kill me!" Kaberu-chan quickly discards her hand.

_Sixty minutes later (again)_

"And big surprise, Marik is first place and Bakura is second! Okay guys, hand over your Millennium Items and Egyptian God Cards!" Kaberu-chan yells.

" Wait, you aren't serious, are you?" Yugi asks desperately.

"Sorry dude, self preservation. Hand over your stuff."

"Hiei, let's continue work on that hypnosis machine, _we_ will rule soon." Hiei and Kaiba walk off to a dark corner.

Odion walks in and witnesses the horror of evil Marik with all three Egyptian god cards and evil Bakura with all 7 Millennium Items. "Sigh. I was hoping it could be avoided, but I see I am going to have to kill you."

"I'll fix it, I promise!" Kaberu-chan yells desperately. She hastily writes Odion into a locked room all on his own.

"Now," turns to evil Marik and Bakura,"If you don't use those items to do my bidding I'll write them away from you."

"And what _is_ your bidding?" they both ask simultaneously. Evil Bakura starts to get a strangled look on his face. "You, these aren't all of the items! The Millennium Necklace is missing!"

Kaberu-chan looks desperately around. "Oh no! Ishizu must have seen the future and-"

The Egyptian God Cards and Millennium Items disappear from evil Marik and Bakura and return to their owners.

"That is enough, do you want the world to end?" Ishizu says.

"Ugh, how dare you use your millennium item to defy my powers as the almighty author! I was going to use my boy-slaves to kill my homeroom teacher! And my algebra teacher! And loads of other people!" Kaberu-chan yells desperately.

Odion has been freed and is glaring intimidatingly.

" Okay, okay, I won't let them destroy the world. I'll stop giving evil guys supreme power. Just don't kill me! Oh, and please return to me my powers as supreme author, or this chapter will never end."

Marik and Bakura turn back to normal.

"Aww man, normal Bakura isn't hot! Oh well, Marik, let's make love." Kaberu-chan grabs hold of Marik's arm, but is immobilized, as she notices Odion has borrowed Hiei's katana and is holding to her neck.

"Um, never mind, I'll be good…"

Kaberu-chan: Yay, the first chapter is done! Maybe in the next one I can write you two in so that all three of us can jump on the bishonen!

Kaberu-nyo: Yeah! That's a great idea, Kaberu-, Kaberu-… Kyaa! I can't tell who's who!

Kaberu-kun: That's because you're an idiot. Come to think of it, you're both idiots. I'm the only one here who can fight, but you two think it'd be okay to go attack all of them? I can't beat that many guys on my own, morons…

Kaberu-chan: Fine, we'll do that in a different chapter… please don't be scared away by how freaky we are! PLEASE READ! PLEASE REVIEW!


End file.
